‘Dragons Is So Stupid’ Proclaims Irate Magic Player
Posted on February 17, 2012
Filed Under Articles, Flashbacks, Staff | 1 Comment
WEST OF THE PECOS — An irate Magic: The Gathering player proclaimed that “Dragons is so stupid!” after drafting a Teneb the Harvester during an eight-man Monday.
The player, who called himself “Time Spiral Sam” and said he was the “roughenest, toughest Magic player this side of the tundra,” was unable to produce the necessary green, white and black mana needed to play the 6/6 legend twice during matches.
“I can’t even cast ya, ya overgrown hornytoad!” the Magic player yelled Monday.
The infuriated player then threw his cards on the ground and stomped on them repeatedly with both feet, jumping up and down.
“Ya no-good lizard! When I say ‘Cast,’ I mean, ‘Cast!’” he said, striking the card with a club.
When asked by a reporter whether he had drafted any mana fixers, the Magic player called the reporter a “buck-toothed varmint.”
“Say yer prayers, ya flea-bitten, fur-bearin’ galoot,” he said. “I’m gonna blow ya to smithereens.”
Earlier, the player had said he came to the draft hoping to become “a zillionaire.”
- Feb. 19, 2007
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Awesome! I saw the title and wondered “Is this what I think it is?”, then saw the subtitle and was sure. Of course, I know it breaks the law for me to say this, but then… I never studied law.