Gruul Say Baby Milk Factory Destroyed By Excessive Response

RAVNICA — Gruul leader Borborygmos appealed to guild leaders Friday, claiming that Boros enforcers had destroyed a “baby milk factory” during a recent engagement against Gruul positions.
“The destruction of this baby milk factory, and you can see the sign, here, clearly saying ‘Baby Milk,’ is yet another step in the Boros League’s excessive response to [...]

Photochop – Ping//Pong

Card Of The Week – Morphling

This week’s card is Morphling. Morphling used to stack combat damage as a 5/1 and then take combat damage as a 0/6. Now Morphling is sad.

Weaver Of Lies Pioneers Entirely New Level Of Sarcasm

APHETTO — Weaver of Lies, the magical Otarian creature who closely follows Magic: The Gathering and current events, researched and developed an entirely new and never-before-reached level of sarcasm Saturday as it spoke about the possiblity of Mike Long being put into the Magic Pro Tour Hall of Fame.
“What a ‘goooooood idea,’” Weaver of [...]

Photochop – The Unthinkable

Local Barbarian Excused From Jury Duty

ORLANDO, Fla. — A local barbarian was excused from jury duty Friday after an exchange with the judge during the voir dire process of a criminal trial in the county courthouse.
Kamahl the Pit Fighter was asked by judge Mary Gonzalez in courtroom 10A here whether he would be able to follow the laws and [...]

Photochop – Bronze Angel

Card Of The Week – Blade Of The Sixth Pride

This week’s card is Blade of the Sixth Pride. Most other creature cards with no abilities have a leg up on Blade of the Sixth Pride, because they have flavor text.

Photochop – Alien Basalt Monolith

Standoff In Honolulu

The big story of the Honolulu Pro Tour wasn’t Kazuya Mitamura’s $40,000 victory in the finals. The big story happened in the first round, where a young boy known only as Hans did something that is causing many to call him a hero.
Hans’s game was looking unwinnable. He had a negative life total [...]

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