Lorwyn, Kamigawa Naming Expert Speaks To Public For First Time

Posted on November 4, 2007
Filed Under Articles, The Previous Poster |

SUNNYVALE, Calif. — The elusive Wizards of the Coast naming expert responsible for the card names in the recent Kamigawa and Lorwyn blocks spoke recently to The Magic Lampoon in an exclusive interview.

The expert, a tiny fellow with pointy ears who introduces himself as Eepertwitter Spindlechirp, lives in a cozy burrow excavated from a hillside, called Windbrisk Heights. Inside, doilies, tassels and pictures of large-eyed kittens dominate every corner.

What follows is a transcript of his conversation with The Magic Lampoon. 

———- 

Spindlechirp: Ah, hello. You must be the articlewriter newsacquirer from the birdcagebottom dailypaper! Please, do come in.

You may hang your colddefence bodyprotectors here. Do sit down. Would you care for some hotwater herbinfusion? I’ve got the waterheater containerdevice heating up already.

Now, I expect you’re wondering how I got the position as creativemind namenamer for the great cardboardrectangle timewaster known as Sufficientlyadvanced: The togetherbringing.

To make a long story notlong, I wrote an informationquery wordseries to the famous “ask Shoreline Magicdoers” column about rule 502.49a, and soon received a reply from a “Matthew Cavotta” who was full of mouthslaver ejaculatingjoy about my writing style, and offered me a lifelong contract!

Needless to say I said “indeedyes affirmativeresponse,” and now people all around the lifebearer spacerock can enjoy my work.

———-

Mr. Spindlechirp nodded happily and served what he called ”houseproduced cake of the apple,” which was delicious and moist.

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